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JAYNE WITH A WHY |
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January 2006 . : On My Perch at Night, I'm Reading A Book On My Kindle: .
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Tuesday, February 27, 2007HOP - ALONG YET AGAINIn August last year, I sprained my left ankle pretty badly & broke a bone in my left foot. It was friggin painful to say the least. Grandma had to take on the household duties, which she did admirably bless her. On Sunday, I stumbled as I was trying to cross Airport Road. By the time I managed to get to my feet, there was 3 lanes of traffic a few feet from my nose. I scampered back up onto the verge & swore just about every obscene word I know. I have now sprained my RIGHT ankle, which is currently bound by one of these...........................
I am, in a succinct nutshell, VERY PISSED OFF. I just don't know what's going on with me, I really don't. I had my Nike takkies (trainers) on, but my foot just gave way & twisted under me. I am reduced to hobbling, yet again. Grandma has been an absolute star - as always. I think she secretly loves being 'in charge'! Mega hugs to my good friend Kaya who stopped by to cheer me up today!  
Saturday, February 17, 2007THE CHRONICLES OF GRANDMA - EPISODE 1 I thought I'd give readers a little bit of a glimpse into my life with Grandma. (She's the little grey haired old lady on the left, just in case you were wondering) 10.00a.m I've read the papers online, checked mail etc & nut off for a shower. Soak dentures. Make the bed. Come out of the bedroom, stick my head in grandmas room & say "Dya wanna cuppa Flowerpot?" Without my dentures, this sounds like a rottweiler with a hare-lip, but I know grandma understands me. She emerges from the depths of her perch, sticks a bleary eyed & rumpled head out from under the duvet & says "No thanks.......I think I'll go back to sleep." Make myself a cuppa, head into the 'laundry room', fill iron with water & switch it on. A pile of ironing awaits me - I can't put it off any longer. Come to computer, crank up Realplayer & open 3 albums worth of tracks by Il Divo - my favourite music to iron to. (I know I'm strange) Turn volume up (screw the neighbours - their brats make a much worse racket) & proceed to laundry room. I warble along to Il Divo. Even I admit it sounds bloody awful, so I try to whistle. Er.....it's a bit difficult with no teeth in - bugger. OK, I hum along to classic tracks like Uno Noche, Nella Fantasia & Nights in White Satin. I hum quietly, but raise my eyebrows alot......it's the passion in the music - duh! Grandma emerges from her pit & comes to find me. "What day is it today?" she says "It's Sunday Flowerpot.......what day did you think it was?" I answer. "Monday" she say accusingly. "If it was Monday I wouldn't be here would I? I'd be at the veggies." I say. "Well why didn't you tell me it was Sunday? I've been waiting for Double Jeopardy & Spin The Wheel to come on TV & that comes on on a Monday!" "So it's my fault it's only Sunday then?" "Oh shurrup, dya want a coffee?" Our LGOL* skulks off to the kitchen & I continue with the ironing. I hear the theme tune to the X-Files on grandmas TV, competing in decibel output with Il Divo. If I had my teeth in, they would be grinding in accustic agony right now............................. *LGOL = Little Grey-haired Old Lady
I don't want much in life, really (whine) I don't. BUT, I do want to get another breadmaker. I bought one when I went to Malawi & we had freshly baked bread whenever the fancy took us, providing there was power that day of course. I took my breadmaker home to Souf Efrika when I left Malawi, but didn't take it to Ghana, as I was told I would be able to buy fresh bread daily. Nuff sed, no worries. Surely methinks - upon my impending arrival in Abu Dhabi - there won't be any need for my breadmaker............nah..........don't be daft I tell myself. There are heaps of bakeries & supermarkets & fresh bread in abundance. True, very true. BUT The majority of bread here is sweet - ewwww. It ranges from being just a tad sweet, to like full on 3 sugars in your coffee sweet & Hubs & Grandma are taking strain - Hubs particularly as he's keeping the manufacturer of Rennies in business. I prefer brown bread, but sometimes even that's a bit sweet. So, I had a brainwave........(they don't happen too often)......& suggested I buy a breadmaker again & make our own bread, like I did when we were Bush Happy. Good idea chirps Hubs & Grandma!
Looks so appealing hey? Ooohhhhhh.....yummy, the smell of freshly baked bread!  Well, I've been to just about every sodding major electrical/appliance outlet in Abu Dhabi, trying to track a bloody bread maker down & to date, I've had no luck - nada - feck all. Good mate Kaya said she'd seen one at the Co-Op in Abu Dhabi Mall, so I nutted over there this afternoon & whoop-de-do there's a Kenwood Breadmaker on the shelf! I asked an assistant if I may please have one . It was Dhs329 - not a bad price. "Sorry madam, that item is no longer in stock." says the nice little assistant, followed by "This model is being taken off the market & we're waiting for Kenwood to bring out the new model." I asked if I could have the one from the shelf & he told me it "wasn't functioning". At that point in time I was tempted to break his little legs, as nice as he was. I came home feeling incredibly dejected. I just want a breadmaker dammit - not a Rolls Royce in metallic midnight blue with twinkling stars on it! If anyone in the Abu Dhabi area knows where I can get one, just one little simplistic breadmaker, please drop me a line. Failing that, maybe I'll have to go through to that nasty city called DuBuy, which I really don't want to do! *BIG SIGH*
Update: Bought one from an home appliance shop about 500m from our apartment - Sod's Law innit!! I'm not happy with the 2 attempts I've had so far, but will keep at it until I get it right!
Saturday, February 10, 2007ON THE LIGHTER SIDETHE ALL NEW GPS SYSTEM FOR SKINT BIKERS  NEARLY AS GOOD AS 'LEADERS OF THE WORLD UNTIE' RIGHT?
UMMMM, SO HAS THE MILK GONE OFF?
A TYPICAL FAMILY ?
AND THIS ONE, JUST FOR KAYA - POACHED MOG! (She's gonna kick my ankles next time she sees me I swear!) 
Sunday, February 04, 2007THE LAST TIMEToday is the last time I will be Fair Fat & Fortysomething. I am fed up. I have the flu. I feel & look like a bag of snakes. My throat feels like I've chewed on a cactus. BUGGER! On a happier note, the Six Nations rugby this weekend has been wicked to watch, I got to see Chikkin via video link up, Dubby Dear & Pup phoned me this morning (as did several other friends/family) & Hubs still wants to give me a hug & kiss because he loves me, even when I feel so crock...........awwwwww :-) This time next year, I'll still be Fair, still be Fat, but I'll be a half century of age. *sniff* *aaaatttiisshhhhhhhhhoooooooooooo*
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